Every relationship passes through seasons just like the seasons of the year. Let me explain. First there is spring. Spring is about new growth, new opportunities, and hope for the future. It represents a vision for what can be. Gardeners know that every spring what has laid dormant for a few months will soon sprout into a wondrous display of color and life. Relationships, when they are new, are filled with possibilities and hope for a positive future. There is no room for doubt or negative feelings or attitudes. Everything is fresh and exciting. They are filled with passion, laughter, and the wonder of discovery. It is a wonderful time, this springtime of relationships.

And then there is summer. Summer is a playful time filled with adventure, activity, long hot days and warm nights. Summer is a time when nature spreads its wings and shows off its diversity and uniqueness. There can also be thunderous storms that appear in an instant, rearing their ugly head as people run for cover against the wind and rain. In relationships summer is a time of fun, new understanding, and a willingness to compromise. It is when people learn what they can and cannot expect. Summers when a person’s guard comes down and they learn the reality of their partner’s dreams, hopes, frustrations, doubts, and, yes, all their idiosyncrasies and inner struggles. It can be a time of adjustment and acceptance or rejection and stress, a continuation of the beauty of spring or the realization and disappointment of settling for less than you had hoped for.

Fall always follows summer. The trees share their splendor, and the flowers begin their retreat in preparation for the long, cold winter ahead. The days grow shorter, and the nights are cooler. The air is crisp and clean. Long gone are the humid days of summer. The fall in relationships is when there is a realization that it is time to accept that you will never find the perfect partner, that you must learn to live with, love, and accept who is in your life now. The excitement and passion of spring can still peek through the fallen leaves and the joy and love can grow into a new dimension, but only if there has been growth and learning during the summer. Fall can be a time of resentment and frustration where the days are filled with longing and unfulfilled desires. There is beauty in the fall, but there can also be uncertainty, fear, and a realization that winter, the end of the beauty and excitement, will soon be a distant memory.

And finally, winter comes. The days are short, and the bitter cold penetrates your essence regardless of the thickness of your garments. The trees are bare, and the blue skies of fall are now covered with a blue-gray shield that keeps the sun hidden from your view. Winters in relationships come to everyone. There are lonesome nights and fearful days. There is adversity and sickness, abandonment, and bitterness. These days seem to cut to the core of our life, leaving us afraid and uncertain of our future and what it might bring.

But remember, if you can weather the winter, spring is just around the corner where new beginnings, once again, share themselves in the hopes that you’ll be ready to embrace once again the joy, the passion, and the love that you once felt. Seasons in relationships are as predictable as the seasons of the calendar. You can’t keep spring around forever, and winter comes whether you like it or want it or not. So why not just relax and enjoy the passing seasons in your relationships as you do watching spring fade into summer and summer into fall?